number three

"i felt alone. forgotten. like nobody there cared about me."
- Mr Ames, ER S13EP05

i get it now.
the reason i fear being forgotten is because i equate being forgotten with not being loved. that when my parents forgot me, i felt that they loved the other 3 more and didn't care about me.

i was young, and it seemed like they never forgot the other 3.
and i guess, in a way, i resented it.

and instead of doing something about it whenever i get forgotten, i just dwelled in self pity.

time to snap out of it.
grow up, marianne.