number three

what good is two As and a B+ when in the end i fail at what i'm supposed to be doing best

worked so hard only to be told that it's not even good enough to pass

what's the point?

i think the hardest part about being back in melb is being the third/fifth wheel.

i just dont geddit how some people just have no sense of style when it comes to developing websites.

simple things like using header tags. or using divs. or aligning.

these are things developers should know. but they just don't!

having a strange sort of calm listening to contemporary christian music while doing assignments.

SO ANGRY.

I ALREADY PURPOSELY MADE SURE THAT EVERY ONE OF US DOESNT PARK IN FRONT SO THAT WE DONT HAVE TO WAKE UP EARLY MORNING CUZ THE LORI SAMPAH WAS COMING.

GUESS WHO THE MAID WAKES UP EARLY THIS MORNING.

WHY DOES SHE ALWAYS WAKE ME UP.

EFFING ANGRY LA. CUZ IT'S NOT EVEN OUR CARS. WHAT CAN I DO????

FUCKING STUPID CARS.

January
. the zon with the family

February
. first round of ward camping

March
. jason mraz concert

April
. noti-nixons came to visit
. moved out of greenavenue
. blew my money on phuket. major regrets

May
. internship w another red wall company

June
. second round of ward camping
. began my final year of uni

July
. mini round of ward camping
. #4's 21st
. kuantan w the family

August
. began my long tops + leggings phase. cuz couldn't fit into any pants/jeans anymore

September
. #42 officially sold. prayers answered.
. removed wisdom teeth

October
. unclepaul lost his battle
. goldie put to sleep

November
. packpackpackpackpack
. jkt w #4 & the father, near death exp at lcct

December
. #1-4 finally reunited. 1 week of crazy lim adventures.
. moved into #47

since i started my fb acc, i've had 21 profile pictures. (in 2 years, that's less than 1 a month!)

and out of those 21:

2 are of me and #4
2 are of me and #1,2,4
2 are of me sleeping
2 are of me (and friends) in front of malaysian landmarks
4 are of me staring somewhere else
3 are not me. of which one is a doll that represents me, one is guy the dog, and one is my 'twin'

and NONE with the kitty.
i don't even know why.

i could have done more.
i could have prevented it from happening.

i know it's not entirely my fault, heck, i shouldn't even be blaming myself. but still, there's this nagging feeling that says i should have done more.

the same nagging feeling that questioned, are you sure he can drive?
you replied, yea, yea, he says he'll drive here
the same nagging feeling that asked after an hour and he still hasn't arrived, do you think you should call him to see if he's alright?
you replied, don't worry lah, he's ok one lah, he says he's on his way
the same nagging feeling when we passed by his house, and his car still wasn't home.

now i know better than to believe an intoxicated person.
now i know, that intoxicated people (both also same lah) have bad judgement.

now i know, if people on the phone can't differentiate between me and the kitty, it means they're not fit to drive.

sigh. i could have stopped you, but i didn't. instead, i let him make the decision when he wasn't even thinking straight. i'm sorry.